Paul is in SF, Yes!: My Trip Around Romania

I just returned from a 12-day tour of Romania with 12 other gay American men. I shouldn't tell you this because I should keep the secret.

The secret is: Romania is Europe's best-kept secret.

Over the next few posts I hope to tell you why. For now, let's just say that Romania is a surprisingly stunning and unspoiled country. Squash those images you have of guards and dogs and barbed wire. Banish all images of spooky, craggy castle ruins haunted by Dracula and his minions. The scariest part of my trip was facing the return flight home.

A trip to Romania can teach you a lot about life. As you pass through the countryside, you see small cottages that have wonderful handcarved wooden arched gates that are a distintive welcoming entryway. Big deal, right? Well, those gates speak of the love of the home, and hospitality to visitors. They aren't mass-produced in vinyl and purchased from the same Home Depot found in every town. There are no Home Depots. The gates were individually made by hand, and reflect the owner and his/her favorite images. There's a big difference in the way life happens in Romania: it's genuine, savors time, and yet is about humble, simple beauty.

Almost all of the houses had well-tended gardens with ripe red tomatoes, cucumbers, a patch of corn, huge colorful dahias, roses, and herbs. I often saw a horse in the yard, and maybe a cow or some sheep, a couple of pigs, and some chickens.

Yes, I saw television antennas and an occasional satellite dish, but more frequently I saw folks sitting on benches in front of their houses, visiting with neighbors and watching the world pass by. They weren't fixated by computers, cell phones, or televisions.

I thought technology was supposed to make our lives simple. I think we've been sold an image of the future that isn't less complicated, easier, or better. It's just faster - so fast that we often forget what the great things in life are, I have friends who'll walk past amazing flowers without seeing them, and who haven't touched growing vegetation with their hands in a very, very long time.

Romania made me think about the way my Polish grandmother lived. I was impressed by her full involvement with her work and her life. She was a genuine, loving soul. That's what I observed with the Romanians I watched, too. There wasn't the crazy chase we are in, trying to attain instant gratification, only to pass on to the next object of desire.

That was the foremost lesson Romania made me think about.